Monday, November 27, 2006

I am now fully insured. Thanks to wonderful financial advisor, I am set with Life (pending the passing of all my medical exams - oh boy!), Health and Disability - they even do car insurance! I have begun retirement planning! Now I just need a steady job with a steady income so I can steadily add to all my investments. woo woo.

Today is a short day - if call volume is low, they're going to let us go two hours early. This is good for a number of reasons. 1) short day! 2) I have a Borders coupon that I have to use today - so I can go after work, and still have enough time to pack an overnight bag - if we do decide to go to T-ville tonight...mmmm family fun with Jen's family. 3) short day! And call volume looks good so far, 45 minutes, one call. I should know by 12 if they're going to let us go. AND, my boss passed out Turkey day cards and chocolates - so the morning at work has started off well.

What is not good is that I failed to get my time card in on time - which means that I won't be paid for last week until next week - not good, not good at all. Stupid me, stupid me.

My new air rifle is very very cool - the only potential problem is with the scope, there's something wrong with it, or I'm not mounting it correctly because i can be looking at the dead center of the bull's eye - and have the shot hit down and to the right by several inches - I had much better luck without the scope. Now I just need to set up an actual range in the house instead of shooting at the trap, sitting on the couch. I did wear safety goggles though.... I want to shoot outside, but it's always dark when I get home and I don't want to freak people out shooting a rifle in my backyard ...additionally I don't know if there are any ordinances about shooting....

So, recall with me that when Lieberman lost the Democratic primary he formed his own party Connecticut for Lieberman (CfL) - fast forward to now. Apparently CfL has no actual members so an annoyed democrat in Connecticut switched his party affiliation to CfL - promptly called a meeting, nominated himself chairman, seconded the nomination and started establishing rules for the party - which he then sent to the sec of state of CT. He also put out a statement that the party of CfL disapproved of Lieberman's abandoning the party by insisting he be called an "independent democrat" in the senate.

It's cold in here. Sometimes at work, I don't think I'll ever be warm again. I want to turn my space heater up, but I don't want to blow the whole circuit - damn them and their unheatable warehouse!

I was first introduced to garum by one Professor Dale at WashU. During her class on archeology she told us about "the unspeakable fish sauce" and how much those gosh darned Romans loved their sauce. When talking about/mentioning garum - she would always say "Garum, the UNSPEAKABLE fish sauce." this has been a memory - welcome to my thoughts. Anyway, here's that garum actually contains - we'll do it in rachel ray format:

take aromatic herbs - dill, coriander, fennel, mint oregano etc
cover bottom of jar
add chopped fatty fish (especially guts)
add 1.5 inches of salt
repeat until jar is full
allow to sit one week in the sun
mix sauce daily for 20 days
enjoy the liquefied salty fish goo.

so the reason i bring it up, is because the one of the largest Roman ships was just found off the coast of Spain. It contained among other things, 1,200 jars of fishy goodness. Note that each jar is currently worth about $1000 to collectors - this prompted the authorities to build a giant metal cage around the whole thing. Here's one last quote about this "delicacy."

"Garum was a highly prized condiment and very nutritious, too, but made out of internal [fish] organs," she said. "I'm told it was extremely smelly, but the Romans just loved it."

Yesterday, I was all thrown off time-wise because we ate lunch early (pot luck thanksgiving dinner, no less), and so I had many more hours after lunch than I thought i would have. So at one point, when I thought that it should be about 4:30p, I looked at the clock and it as only 2:40p - I about cried.

People always continue to disappoint me... on the phone. Would you really talk to someone in person the way that you just talked to me on the phone? How about formulating your thoughts on a given subject, for instance your question, before you dial the number? That way, I don't have to listen to you stutter for 30-seconds, while you figure out what you want to say.

1hr 45min, 8 calls.

Meanwhile, Google hit $500 yesterday and apple hit its all time high too. fuck me. explain to me again, why I didn't buy these stocks years and years ago? since i fictionally bought google, it's up $92, apple is up $31 and jcrew is up $14. silly silly me.

I hate when people won't get off the phone with me and it is past 5pm. I know, I know. How could they know that I get off at 5pm? But the better question is, why are they still working after 5pm? Especially when they are so dumb. This guy wanted to know why we couldn't tell him all the information that he entered and would continue to enter - why couldn't we spit that back out for him? and, "how was he supposed to know what he had ordered?" The better question is, if he entered the information in the first place, wouldn't he know what he had ordered? And why was he keeping me on the phone with his inane questions? I suggested an excel spreadsheet..."but what if my computer crashes? I'll lose everything!" are people stupid, i asked myself. i calmly suggested that he save his file, or save it to a disk, or email it to himself. 7 minutes later he agreed that maybe that could work. i didn't leave last night until 5:25p. grrrr.

anyway, it's 3:30 now and they're letting me go, i have a fun filled family night tonight and tomorrow, after that it's relaxing and relaxing. have a good long weekend everyone, we'll be back on monday.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

i'm told that we are to have a guest blogger later today, ella bella will be sending a shout out from the big city- we look forward to her contribution...

today is going pretty well so far (aside from being damn cold). I woke up and felt good - like i actually got enough sleep for once - got up, showered, walked the dog and was able to ride to work with jen (in order to pick up the other car - but it meant that i got to ride with her ) and i only got to work a little late...i do wish that i had worn a heavier jacket and maybe two pairs of socks, but, oh well. also - today is like monday and wednesday all rolled into one.

this week should be extraordinarily interesting. three day work week and then 1.5 solid family time. First we head to t-ville for some family time with jen's family, stay the night, and hit them up for some more family time in the morning, then drive back hit up one side of my family quickly and then on to turkey dinner at the other side of the family. i expect then we will stumble, fatly, into bed to enjoy the rest of the weekend. jen worked her ass off in the past few weeks and as a reward, she gets to take off work friday and saturday, yay!

so there's this couple in san francisco that is trying raise awareness for an event that they are going to have on the solstice to try and change the world for the better. the event is orgasm for peace....princeton has these receptors that measure changes in the global consciousness by measuring changes in random number generators. supposedly, directed mass meditation/prayer causes changes - they're hoping that a global orgasm event will stimulate (forgive me) the same kind of change...for the better. so if you want to participate, i think it's december 2nd - lay back, relax, and change the world.

the new bond movie - i like it. new bond = good bond. he's much rawer, less civilized, uncut, rough - a welcome change. the story has some....problems, the ending leaves something to be desired and makes you scratch your head - all in all, though, very enjoyable.

happy feet - go see it, you can't help but leave with a smile on your face.

here's another recipe for our friend rachel ray:

1/4 cup olive oil and butter
put in pan
slather catfish with mustard
dip in black pepper (both sides)
fry baby fry
fork. eat. yum.

i've conquered the lack of java/flash! by cleverly installing firefox i have gotten around the ban on flash/java - i can play as many as i want! or watch videos! or view cool websites that use java/flash and have been closed to me since i started working here - i. am. so. smart.

ella bella from the big city:
I have a confession to make -- I don't actually work in a cubicle. In
fact, I work OUTSIDE a cubicle... In a hallway. That's right -- A

I sit near the main color printer and a giant plaster neoclassical
column. There is even some sort of sculptural relief at the top of it,
presumably to look decorative, even though the column itself is a
creme color, and the walls are white (making it look like an
unfortunate accident of architecture). I wonder about painting choices
made in this office. Every other wall is a different shade of
white/creme. I also wonder about the makers of cubicles. What's with
the fake corrugated look?

But more importantly, why is it that the printer behind me makes an
obnoxious buzzing/ringing sound 24/7? I noticed it on my second day
here, and now I can't get the sound out of my head. I might go crazy.

In truth, work isn't that bad. Could be better, could be worse.

Could be better:
- Ringing sound of printer
- Harsh lighting above my head
- The fucking breeze coming out of the giant windows (that some
asshole thought it was a good idea to open)

Could be worse:
- I could actually be in one of the cubicles
- ...That have no lighting at all

Interestingly, my phone shows 1 Old Message, but I have yet to figure
out how to check said message. It's been there for 2.5 weeks now.

Oh, one more thing that "could be worse" --
Yesterday I got to be friends with one of my new coworkers who is
actually my age and isn't afraid to talk about socially taboo
subjects. She mentioned also that she was going to the gynecologist
because of an abnormal pap smear. Well, turns out she has cervical
cancer. Oh, and did I mention her insurance expired yesterday?

Things could be much worse. Much much worse.

In the meantime, though, my fingers are numb and I have 6 more hours
until I get to go home and walk the 1.2 miles from the bus stop to my
house. Sweet. Maybe I can convince my boss I'm actually deathly ill
and need to go home at like, 2. Yes, I will try this...

Monday, November 20, 2006

It's funny how some young "professionals" are just high school kids, with high school drama and high school antics, that have well paying jobs.

They should put solar panels on the top of the fleet of cars that Americans drive to work everyday and leave to do nothing, the whole day in the parking lot. Why not equip those cars with solar panels, use that fancy new technology that allows you to wirelessly charge things, and put those cars to work! I wonder how much energy could be produced - enough to power part of the workplace? Shouldn't that alone be enough incentive? Ok, if the cars were fitted with a solar panel capable of producing 750 W/day (median production capability) and there are 144 million cars in the US - we'll say half are fitted with panels - we could produce 52,500 mW/day. For perspective, a residential house uses .5mW/month. I think solar panels on cars would be well worth it...

Speaking of worth it, here's something that's not...worth it. I saw on ebay today, a Play Station 3 (bought new for around $600) that was going for $7500 with 17 minutes remaining. There were 51 bidders....who are these people? Who is going to pay almost 8 GRAND for a toy that will be available for 92% less in around two weeks? Apparently many many people. If I had been smart, I would have gathered the money together and stood in line to get a PS3 and then sold it for a HUGE profit. silly me. UPDATE: I just saw one go for $15k - and didn't include shipping! hahahaha! and it didn't include shipping! hahaha ....what i don't get is the same offering that went a minute later for $3k....

and silly my sister. she has tickets to the USC v. Notre Dame game and she is not selling them...just check out what she could be getting for them on ebay.

Fridays are always nice and quiet. And that's the way I like it. Happy Feet tonight!

Space cadet is interviewing for an internal transfer position here. If she gets it, I am virtually guaranteed a permanent job here- so as much as she annoys us, cross your fingers!

Sitting watching people bid exorbitant amounts on ebay, for a toy, is a great way to pass the time at work.

so a student who refused to show his student ID at the school library after hours because he felt he was being racially profiled was tasered five times at UCLA by campus police. Several of the shocks happened while he was handcuffed. he is now filing suit for excessive force. i think he should file charges. more on this later.

Friday, November 17, 2006

There was supposed to be 1-2 inches of slushy snow mix on the ground this morning - what was there when I looked outside - nothing. The band that would have produced that frothy mix ended up miles and miles south of us. How is it that anyone can keep their job when they are wrong so much of the time. I love it when i was listening to the weatherman this morning who talked about today's and tomorrow's weather - while completely avoiding the fact that he had predicted 1-2 inches of snow that never showed up this morning. I wish I could so calmly gloss over errors of mine.

Google bought blogger and is now making changes. why this annoys me: I use a different email address than the one that is on file with blogger - this is because i want in no way to be associated with my real email address, which as we all know is my name. Therefore i have a different gmail address that i use with the blogger account to avoid using my real address. Now, that being said, I use my real address to write my posts into a draft and post them later (this is because i don't want to be accessing blogger here at work) - so, when i log into blogger - i now have to log in with my google account, ok that's all well and good. but then i have to log into a different google account to get to the post. this inevitably signs me out of either blogger or gmail because you can't have different google accounts open at the same time! grrrr!! and i don't like the new layour of the 'beta" version. bleh

speaking of updating - I recently updated caris' blog, so if you've been hankering for some of her musings - you know have roughly four new posts. can i just say that i miss her lots.

Ever wonder where you you can purchase riot gear?
\n \ni hate when people imply that you personally wronged them in some way. for instance this gentleman on the phone had a problem with one of our products - he said " i just can\'t understand why you would do something like that." uh, sir, I had nothing to do with it. thank you. \n\n \n \n \n \n \n\n",0]
there you go. and who would have guessed that it would br from aramark?

i hate when people imply that you personally wronged them in some way. for instance this gentleman on the phone had a problem with one of our products - he said " i just can't understand why you would do something like that." uh, sir, I had nothing to do with it. thank you.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

It started raining last night, it's still raining, it's not supposed to stop raining until friday morning - and that includes snow tonight and thursday. yuck.

ok, if you were ordering something, and i was walking you through the order, and i said "click on the link that says 'click to purchase'" and you saw on the screen a link that said "click here to place order," what would you think? you would not believe the number of people that are so afraid to click a button - like we are magically going to go into their bank account and take money - that they won't use a little common sense. "Click to purchase," "Click here to place order." grr.

another pet peeve - when i'm directing someone how to do something and they refuse to do it they way that I'm tellin them to do it - even though i'm telling them the right way. case in point: lots of people have problems when we resend a new password, is it an "O" or an "0" is it an "I" or a "1" - what we do is tell people to copy and paste the password directly into the password field in order to bypass user error. Some people refuse to do this... "Ok, I've sent out a new password, if you can copy and paste the password from the email directly into the password field, it should let you right in." clack clack clickity clack "It's not working" "Did you-" "Oh, is that an 1 or an I..." "Ma'am if you just copy and paste it-" "It's not WORKING." "Ma'am-" "Ok, let me try one more thing.....oh! it's an "I" maybe that's why it wasn't working." Really? The password wasn't working because you were entering the wrong one? Really? Well, we'll have to do something about that - like not having passwords anymore. Then you'll never have to figure out if it's an "I" or a "1" - or you could just copy and paste like I asked you.

I know, I've been absentee again today - but I did buy an air rifle - proceed to target process fun, do not pass Go.

Management randomly bought pizza and ice cream for the entire office today - that's pretty nice, sure beats easy mac and no dessert. I had a delicious chocolate lovers drumstick. mmm mm. also my boss told me that the job posted and additionally the fourth full time position for what i'm doing now was also approved for next year - but it was unclear when it would post. she did say that she had spoken with bossman and she was amenable to keeping me temping until it became available - so one way or the other, it does look like i will continye to be emplyed by aeis - cross your fingers. god forbid cancel cancel jewish jewish spit spit spit (hat tip ariela).

carl just said into his phone "wobble wobble - drop it like its hot"

you know, working here isn't so bad when you know it's pouring outside - though the realization that you did not bring a coat or an umbrella puts a little damper on that.

here's how neurotic i am: 10 minutes after I started my morning commute it occured to me that I may not have turned off teh stove from when i made myself an egg this morning. so instead of saying, surely i turned it off - i turned around and drove all the way back the house (in the pouring rain) to find that I had, in fact, turned it off. silly me. and the whole thing defeated the purpose of leaving for work early - on order to avoid the rain storm that was about to hit. so instead of being early and dry at work, i was late and wet. nice.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

so heroes. what's going on with that show. i only watch it infrequently, and unfortunately if you miss a show, you have no idea what's going on. I turned it on last night and though i was watching a different show because for the first segment before commercial break, I recognized a sum total of no one. i mean i know save the cheerleader, save the world (said in the same tone as wehrenburg wehrenberg) which means today, for my activity i'll be reading about what's going on. i'm so glad that my time is so well spent.

meanwhile, the car just needed some brake fluid, because it had none. while running the car to get the fluid coursing through the vehicle, I was prompted to shout "juice me!" "JUICE ME!" to which, my father gave me a quizical look. Also, he says the car needs new brakes. yuck. but i don't want to pay anymore money i said, no more money.

Have i ever mentioned that we are required to fill out a form for every call that we take? This is supposed to leave notes for people in the future so that if you call back, we know your history. This is good in theory. However, we have to do the form for EVERY call - which means that every call that is misrouted, or dialed incorrectly or that is just a simple question must be logged. And that sucks alot. That means that at any given time I have 5-10 "tickets" that still need to be entered. and I hate them. They have not once been useful to me when assisting a client. NOT ONCE.

air rifles. air rifles. do i really need one? no. do i want one? yes.

and then a wave of phone calls and shitty work hit. no more comments were added yesterday, hopefully today, i will be able to talk more...

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

aaaaaaaaand we're back.

Katie informed me that though the standoff two blocks from her office did not end until after 7pm on Friday, she was allowed to go home.

I am incapable of waking/staying up late anymore. Because I get up at 6am on the weekdays, I can sleep no later than 7:30am on the weekends - this means that I also go to bed early. This is why I feel old. I intend to work out more so that I can have more energy to ....unpack! The t-room is still overflowing with unpacked boxes. Jen and I said that we would unpack three a day until they were gone, starting yesterday. Unfortunately, we unpacked zero. We also said that we would do laundry, unfortunately we did none of the four large mounds that we have. We said that we would start working out again, and we did...sort of. Last night we resumed our long put on hold habit of boxing. and it felt great! unfortunately it only lasted for a couple of minutes, and it did make my teeth rattle, but on the whole it was nice, especially with christmas music in the background. and, surprisingly, I am not sore today.

Meanwhile, Lieberman is still a shit. Witness "Lieberman Leaves GOP Door Open",0,6768878.story?coll=hc-headlines-politics-state

jen is a hero and came to have lunch with me ... again. and she brought delicious delicious mexican from this place called matador. mmm mm yum. and i have left-overs for dinner.

happy feet is coming out on friday, joy joy joy joy! i have waited many months for happy feet and now i will be satisfied by an imax experience - speaking of which, if you want to go, let me know.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnd, i'm goiing to london in june and paris.

in other news, i hate this place. i am now actively looking for another job. did i mention that i hate the job search. why can't someone just find me? who knows. so i hate this place. i hate the lights and the smell and the cube - i don't even have a whole cube! i have approximately 4 feet of desk space and no walls. i hate this place. hopefully they will give me the job and i will get a real cube in the new place (yes they are moving) and hopefully the new place will have natural lighting and not be a former warehouse. hopefully the new place will be able to stay warm and have pleasant colors.

and the car is broke again. something with teh power steering - like it doesn't work. you never know how much you rely on the power steering until it's gone- you really have to fight the wheel - really the whole car. it makes it pretty impossible to drive.

i hate mondays

and this is why:

I had a woman call in asking why her order had been cancelled. I looked in the system and yes, it said that her order had been cancelled. I looked at the notes and it said the order had been rekeyed as a different order number (B) - so I looked up that order number only to find that it had been rekeyed as a different order number (C) - so I looked up that order number only to find that it had been rekeyed as a different order number (B). How's that for circular reasoning? Eventually I determined, that despite the notes about rekeying, one of the orders was still good and would go out when we received payment. ugh.

the second story is about a woman that called in to cancel two orders. i took her account number and order numbers, i sent a not along to finance to have those orders cancelled only to have them get back to me that not only were there no orders under that account for the amounts that I had given, but those order numbers did not exist. further, i had failed to get the womans name and number because i assumed that they would be attached to her account info. silly me.

i hate mondays

Monday, November 13, 2006

The recent warm weather has made me feel that we have gone through winter in just a couple of weeks. It feels very much like spring when you step outside in the morning to walk the dog/go to work. It actually makes me feel pretty shitty because winter has not come yet, and it promises to be cold and wet this year. No spring/summer yet...though give global warming a couple more years and we will see what we will see.

My office is trying to make me chubby. All last week it was brownies and cake. Today, bagels.

here's your word plus one story of the day:

10: House Pests

"Check the Yellow Pages."

"Ah, here it is. 'Dolphin Poison.'"

meanwhile, mexico city approves the registering of your civil union for legal purposes. go mexico! how can one of the largest cities in a staunchly catholic country go ahead and approve of the gays, and yet here in the good old USA, where 50% aren't even sure there's a god - we keep outlawing the consensual union of two people of the same sex.

via slashdot: "Robot Identifies Human Flesh as Bacon"

holy shit. "a lawsuit in germany will seek a criminal prosecution of [Rumsfeld]",8599,1557842,00.html
The plaintiffs are 11 Iraqis that were held at Abu Ghraib. The documents, to be filed next week seek an investigation and prosecution of Rumsfeld, Gonzales, and Tenet along with numerous other high ranking civilian and military officials for their (alleged) role in the abuses there. I think they forgot Cheney and Bush....

Two things-

One, in my post yesterday, i made a giant freudian slip, "they show characters set in a different time/culture bust still recognizable" notice anything? perhaps me typing bust when talking about the two lovely ladies that were xena and gabrielle, when I meant to type the much more tame, though not by much, but. I could have typed butt - does that make me a boob girl?

Two, Katie is in a lockdown at her office because a double murder suspect is holded up in a house two blocks away from her. sucks on a friday. here's the story -

Okay, I lied. Three things: Three, I love comments. Leave me some love. I had a comment today from Frank, the gentleman who's doing word plus one. i think i'll go leave him a comment right now. It's also nice to know that other people check up on their websites to see who has been around and where they came from.

The internet is wonderful because you can always find/learn something new. Links upon links. They can lead you anywhere. This, also is the folly of the internet, because sometimes you can't reconstruct how you got somewhere, and you stupidly did not save the link. I know there are services that allow you to "clip" or "digg" but I just haven't found something that is completely easy to use, or up to my rigorous specifications. maybe i haven't given them enough of a chance (or maybe my office doesn't use firefox, which has convenient add-ons)- i'll try and let you know.

Friday, November 10, 2006

i know i haven't updated, but for the past two days i have been closely following results as they have come in. after reviewing all the information that could be had, i just didn't feel like talking about it, let alone writing about it. yesterday was spent looking for jobs (yes, i still need one) and playing with make magazine. we should be back to our regularly scheduled programming now.

so, like cleansing fire the democrats swept through the house and senate reclaiming them for the people. hallelujah. allen (VA-sen) is expected to concede later today, making the coup complete and total. there are some still contested house races in FL, NC and OH - we are expected to pick up one or two more seats in the House. Regardless, we'll have a hefty majority and say these names with me Madam Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Majority Leader Harry Reid. Muahahahahah....bring on the subpoenas.

meanwhile in other news, bill mahr outed ken melman- chairmen of the rnc as gay gay gay. americablog posted the video of the cnn segment last night. today he got hit with a cease and desist order (from youtube) telling him to take it down. cnn has also edited their transcript to censor the admission that ken mehlmen is gay gay gay. fishy fishy fishy. for continuing coverage pls check back with americablog.

i just talked to my boss again about that job that she mentioned previously, the one that is a cross between the job i currently do and some reporting (the extra work i did here last year). she said that off the record, the position had been signed off on and they were just figuring out salary etc. she said that i should sit tight and she would let me know when it was available. she also mentioned that there had been talk of creating a fourth full time position in the job that i currently have now. so hopefully there are two prospects waiting for me. i would think that i should be able to get one of them. i would be much happier in this job once they move to their new building -- maybe they have somethng called natural light. i saw the sun for approximately an hour this morning while driving to work. i'm told that it's 70 degrees and beautiful outside, but i'm trapped in a warehouse with no windows. i have a headache to match.

speaking of headaches, you may want to check out this article before you reach for that bottle of tylenol. seems that metal shards have been found in 300 acetominophen pills. millions have been recalled.

how do you feel about a Clinton/Obama run?

speaking of needing a job. i need a job. i don't do sales. i can do clerical work, but i prefer soemthing more exciting. i like to work with my hands. i like working with my head. i looked into americorps emergency response team but couldn't make the time committment. anyone/everyone's thoughts on this matter would be greatly appreciated. you don't have to give me a job, you just have to give me an idea.

i know i know, i've looked at careerbuilder, monster, etc etc they're almost exclusively business/sales jobs or clerical/it -all things i am not interested in.

note: katie and kristen have one of the cutest dogs i have ever seen.

flash fiction: short stories, generally less than 2,000 words that have all the classic elements of a story. more explanation at wiki, here: anyway, it's great to read at work if you are often interrupted because it only takes a heartbeat to read. i've been reading some 55 word stuff via and also the first has stories exactly 55 words long and the second started with a one word story and each day adds a story one word longer. first story: title: It's happening story: Apocolypse-- he just started the project, so add it to your list. todays story: title: blank. story: I'm missing three hours. What's this on my hands?

Here's a favorite 55 word(er):

Lord of the Rings:
Gandolf took the ring from Bilbo and handed it to Frodo. "Take this ring and drop it in the volcano at Mt. Doom" he said. "Gwaihir the Eagle will give you a ride." The flew off, dropped the ring and came home for tea. "Bugger me!" said Sauron as he died; then everybody was happy. --

I really enjoy online fiction. I think that it gives a platform for some very talented writers that perhaps before would never be heard. Also there is some great fan fiction out there. I know i know, go ahead, poo poo fan fiction - but it's really just writers using a show as a spring board. alot of fan fiction is complete crap. some of it is very good. some of it is actually published - getting around copyright by using uber-characters - the show character set in a different time/culture bust still recognizable. An excellent example is Sharon Bower's Lucifer Rising - xena and gabrielle thrown way forward in time:

"Lucifer Rising is a novel about love and fear. It is the story of fallen DEA angel Jude Lucien and the Miami Herald reporter determined to unearth Jude's secrets. When an apparently happenstance meeting introduces Jude to reporter Liz Gardener, the dark ex-agent is both intrigued and aroused by the young woman. A sniper shot intended for Jude strikes Liz, and the two women are thrown together in a race to discover who is intent on killing her. As their lives become more and more intertwined, Jude finds herself unexpected falling for the reporter, and Liz discovers that the agent-turned-drug-dealer is both more and less than she seems.
In eloquent and spare language, author Sharon Bowers paints a dazzling portrait of a woman driven to the darkest extremes of the human condition-and the journey she makes to cross to the other side. "
uh-huh, anyone familiar with the xena/gabrielle story line (and i will shameless admit that i am, and shamelessly admit that i am in the midst of watching every episode via netflix) can tell you that this is about them. i mean come on, "the dark ex-agent," "intrigued and aroused by the young woman"<- who happens to be a journalist, hello!? "thrown together" i might as well be quoting from the xena script. xena the dark ex-warlord fatefully meets gabrielle the bard and finds herself intrigued and aroused for six seasons. at any rate, the book is supposed to be fantastic, and i know the author is very very good- having read her other stuff.
i hate getting a phone call as i am clicking "offline-personal" to go the restroom. i hate it even more when it is a long long phone call. twenty-two minutes later i finally made it to the bathroom. also, they've recently installed another toilet paper dispencer on top of the one already there, why?

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

isn't a 24-hour curfew more accurately a lockdown, or placing everyone under house arrest?

an order establishing a specific time in the evening after which certain regualations apply, esp. that no civilians or other specified group of unauthorized persons may be outdoors or that places of public assembly must be closed.
a regulation requring a person to be home at a certain prescribed time, as imposed by a parent on a child
the time at which a daily curfew starts
all the definitions imply that there is a start and end time, not that it lasts the entire day. Calling it a curfew suggests something more peaceable than saying that Baghdad is locked down because of a concern about violence.

one day until the election, one more day. one more day until dawn breaks over the United States (I realize that dawn breaks over the US everday, but this is a metaphor...)

Haggard - 5020; up from 2160 on friday
kerry - 3830; up from 3540
boehner - 279; up from 207
and here's a new one: army times; 608
"army times" referring to the story that the army/navy/air force times all called for the resignation of defense sec. rumsfeld....however, we find that this huge story, is still almost 10 times smaller than the gay sex scandal of an evangelical and 5 times smaller than kerry's botched joke....the state of our nation...

the weekend was relaxed - lauren and moshi were in town, which made for a full, dog infested house and lots of fun. saturday night we hit up one of jen's friend's sex toy party, and i won't lie and say that we didn't buy anything. the woman who was running the party annoyed me for repeatedly talking about how this or that product would attract the men....jamie was a hero for pointing out " that's not going to work for everyone here!" after the sex toys, we partook of some buffalo wild wings and more beer - briefly considered going to novak's but after finding that mostly people were going to attitudes, we decided to enjoy some mr. and mrs. smith w/ pjs, instead. and it was a very nice night. sunday was all day football - a great way to relax even if the rams do suck.

i like this map: it uses red, blue and shades of purple to show the percentages of voters voting for either side. red = strong republican win, blue = strong democratic win, and purple shows a win by a slight majority. As you can see, our nation is not a red nation, but instead it is a decidedly purple nation. this is a cartogram. A cartogram resizes by population - see how little true red there is. for more info like this go here: point is, this map: is not particularly accurate.

Here's some more cartograms - for the world, covering a wide range of subjects.

a restaurant that serves nothing


Monday, November 06, 2006

When did it get to be November 3?

Ok, Roko gives a plausible answer as to why sailors are being killed in Iraq, from the comments

"The USMC [United States Marine Corp] does not maintain it's own medics; the Marines have been served by Navy Hospital Corpsmen since WWI. That is probably why a sailor was killed with marines in action."

Fair enough Roko, lets take a look at how these sailors were deployed...

10/13 members of the Naval Mobile Construction Battalion 14 were KIA in action - their mission is "to be mobilization ready in the event of war, conflict, natural/man-made disaster or other event which should require the activation of all or part of the battalion personnel for construction, combat, relief or related participation."

8/46 Sailors were assigned to Medical Units.

And what the hell was a member of the coast guard doing in Iraq, let alone getting killed? Also, 378 members of the National Guard - I like Mississippi's Mission Statement the best -

"As a partner in the Total Force, the Mississippi National Guard has the federal mission to support and defend the Constitution of the United States. The State mission of the Mississippi National Guard is to provide trained and disciplined forces for domestic emergencies, or as otherwise required by state law. "

What part of being in Iraq "defends the constitution" or is a "domestic emergency"?

Meanwhile, back in the good old states, the head of the national association of evangelicals that I mentioned yesterday....has resigned, and admitted complicity in some of the accusations leveled by a gay (and male) prostitute. All I can say is HA Huh HA ha HA. Here's what I think about all those rabid anti-gay evangelicals....they're all gay and in denial. every single one of them.

As an added bonus, " Religious right spokesman: Haggard scandal will absolutely depress evangelical voter turnout " (via Americablog) Commence laughing exuberantly. What is it with republicans and their gay sex scandals?

Via Katie - the blog covers energy drinks of all kinds. My favorite comments came from the non-review of Cocaine Energy Drink, some excerpts for your consumption:

"This drink is so bad it makes me want to kill truck loads of puppies... it burned my throat so bad i dont have a throat anymore... i have to eat with a straw because the phosphorous is so intese... If you drink this drink you will decend into the fire pits of hell and dance with satan in a firy circle of extacy.. well maybe not extacy rather than a pile of shit.. that is basically what this drink is.. a piece of shit in liquid form (diarehha)and it burns .. hot damn! turned my penis into a wet noodle covered in franks red hot sauce" (editors note: spelling remains unchanged)

"Amazing. So much energy. Yes, it burns, but it's for your own protection: If you drank this all at once, you would ascend and become a being of pure energy. It's that powerful."

"your all stupid as hell. If you want to go get a kick why don't you just go smoke some meth? Those energy drinks are bad for you, your teeth, and your stomach. what ever happened to one cup of coffee in the morning"

Remember the experiment we ran yesterday by typing "kerry and joke" intoo google news and then doing the same with "boehner and rumsfeld"? The first referring to a non-issue and the second referring to an actual insult to the troops? Well "kerry and joke" got 3190 hits yesterday and "boehner rumsfeld" got 240 hits. I did the same experiment today. "kerry joke" = 3480, "boehner rumsfeld" = 210. so over the course of the day the non-issue had an increase of 9% and the actual insult had coverage decrease by 12.5%....see anything wrong with this picture? Happily the ted haggard story (anti-gay gay evangelical pastor) is at 1880, and i suspect it will increase dramatically.

This (via ariela) from bill hicks:

As I sit here at my job, I am reminded of a Mr. Bill Hicks...By the way if anyone here is in advertising or marketing... kill yourself.No, no, no it's just a little thought. I'm just trying to plant seeds. Maybe one day, they'll take root - I don't know. You try, you do what you can. Kill yourself.Seriously though, if you are, do.Aaah, no really, there's no rationalisation for what you do and you are Satan's little helpers.Okay - kill yourself - seriously. You are the ruiner of all things good, seriously. No this is not a joke, you're going, "there's going to be a joke coming," there's no fucking joke coming. You are Satan's spawn filling the world with bile and garbage. You are fucked and you are fucking us. Kill yourself. It's the only way to save your fucking soul, kill yourself.Planting seeds. I know all the marketing people are going, "he's doing a joke... there's no joke here whatsoever. Suck a tail-pipe, fucking hang yourself, borrow a gun from a Yank friend - I don't care how you do it. Rid the world of your evil fucking machinations. Machi... Whatever, you know what I mean. I know what all the marketing people are thinking right now too,"Oh, you know what Bill's doing, he's going for that anti-marketing dollar. That's a good market, he's very smart."Oh man, I am not doing that. You fucking evil scumbags! "Ooh, you know what Bill's doing now, he's going for the righteous indignation dollar. That's a big dollar. A lot of people are feeling that indignation. We've done research - huge market. He's doing a good thing." Goddammit, I'm not doing that, you scum-bags!Quit putting a goddamn dollar sign on every fucking thing on this planet!"Ooh, the anger dollar. Huge. Huge in times of recession. Giant market, Bill's very bright to do that." God, I'm just caught in a fucking web."Ooh the trapped dollar, big dollar, huge dollar. Good market - look at our research. We see that many people feel trapped. If we play to that and then separate them into the trapped dollar..."
Even stars have problems with their landlords - Maya Rudolph of SNL is suing her landlord for $450,000 and change for their apartment infested with bedbugs...

Oh yeah, and I hope you don't like seafood. A recent report out from a team of ecologist and economists says that "If current trends of overfishing and pollution continue, the populations of just about all seafood face collapse by 2048." Yes, you heard that right, no seafood. We will have exhausted the most abundant food source on the planet. We are fucked. That is messed the fuck up.

I hate not having flash. It so limits the websites that I can visit - especially those that would pass the time.

This is just weird -
"Naked Man Arrested On Weapons Charge: Indecent exposure suspect near El Cerrito BART station had a screwdriver hidden within body cavity, police say"

I just had the best phone call of my life. Gentleman (mr. mike) calls in this morning, he has received the gift boxes that you are supposed to put our product in, but has not received the actual product. i tell him that i'll call him back. We look into the system, seems his order has been cancelled - but looking into the back end of the system, we discover that it hasn't really been cancelled but has in fact shipped...and we determine that it was delivered this morning. My boss calls someone in shipping and I call UPS to find out if one tracking number could have been used for two packages - they confirm that the tracking number was only assigned to one package and that was delivered. Meanwhile, I have mr. mike go check with his dock to make sure that no other package was delivered. he says no. i tell him that we're still awaiting an answer through my boss and that i'll call him later - he grudgingly accepts this... after i get off the phone with him, my boss finally comes back with the answer. the gift boxes and product ship the same box. therefore, mr. mike has had them the whole time - he just didn't look through the entire box. I take great pleasure in calling mr. mike back to tell him - i refuse to leave a message and instead hang up and call back later so that i can personally tell him that he's an idiot. somewhat disappointingly, he sounded apologetic and didn't try to be an ass...


Three quarters of Britons surveyed (one of our closest allies in the war on terra) think that bush is a bigger threat than the head of the "rogue nation" that recently tested nuclear weapons, the crazy Kim Jong Il and the head of the axis of evil country that wants to wipe Israel off the map, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. Kim and Ahmadinejad receive a measly 69% and 62% respectively. Bush is topped only by Osama bin Laden who received 87%.

UPDATE on haggard - google news now lists 2160 hits, up from 1880, an increase of 13%.
kerry is up to 3540 (+2%, +10% ) (3480 - this morning) (3190 - yesterday)
boehner rumsfeld down to 207 (-1.5%, -14%) (210 - this morning)(240 - yesterday)

That's our LIBERAL media in action.

caller: "you're like my new best friend."

on yeah, it seems that the bush administration was playing politics with national security again, and posted documents that could be used to build atomic weapons - the headline from NYT "U.S. Web Archive Is Said to Reveal a Nuclear Primer" and the link
and excerpts:

" recent weeks, the site has posted some documents that weapons experts say are a danger themselves: detailed accounts of Iraq's secret nuclear research before the 1991 Persian Gulf war. The documents, the experts say, constitute a basic guide to building an atom bomb. "

"The documents, roughly a dozen in number, contain charts, diagrams, equations and lengthy narratives about bomb building that nuclear experts who have viewed them say go beyond what is available elsewhere on the Internet and in other public forums. For instance, the papers give detailed information on how to build nuclear firing circuits and triggering explosives, as well as the radioactive cores of atom bombs. "

"The director of national intelligence, John D. Negroponte , had resisted setting up the Web site, which some intelligence officials felt implicitly raised questions about the competence and judgment of government analysts. But President Bush approved the site's creation after Congressional Republicans proposed legislation to force the documents' release."

"Peter D. Zimmerman, a physicist and former United States government arms scientist now at the war studies department of King's College, London, called the posted material "very sensitive, much of it undoubtedly secret restricted data." "

"On Sept. 20, the site posted a much larger document, "Summary of technical achievements of Iraq's former nuclear program." It runs to 51 pages, 18 focusing on the development of Iraq's bomb design. Topics included physical theory, the atomic core and high-explosive experiments. By early October, diplomats and officials said, United Nations arms inspectors in New York and their counterparts in Vienna were alarmed and discussing what to do."


Thursday, November 02, 2006

I know, I know- I haven't been updating as often as I should. I'll try and do better.

My head hurts again - I suspect it is caused by eye strain from staring at a computer screen for 8 hours a day with no natural light. Good news though, my heater is still working, and I am snug and warm, snug and warm with a massive headache.

I need a job, a permanent job. I looked all day yesterday - that's where I was, you'll note that the post labeled "wednesday" was actually from tuesday. i don't want a clerical/data entry job. I'm tired of paperwork and computers. I checked out Americorp's Emergency Response Team, but found that they keep you all week and let you go home on the weekend. I checked out a position as a geospatial analyst - but I don't think i have enough science credits. I checked out openings at the Botanical Gardens, and Purina, and the St. Louis County Police. I wish there was a good way for me to just write about myself and put it out in the world - someone would find me and put me to work...and I know I can sortof do that with a resume and coverletter, post it to monster or career builder - but i read that online only lists about 10% of available jobs. most of those jobs are clerical or business- and i don't want that. i need a giant list of available jobs, i need to go through it and highlight things that might be interesting. i need help.

keith olbermann had yet another excellent special comment last night. he took on the ridiculousness that is the uproar over kerry's non-insult to the troops. he points out, and others have noted that kerry's joke cost no one their life. Bush's joke about not being able to find weapons of mass destruction (despite searching high and low in the white house) has killed 2018 of the united states' finest. I saw lots of soldiers in the airports during my trip this weekend. what struck me most, was how young they looked. I know that i'm 23 now and 18 is five years younger, but they looked like they were kids, fourteen or so. It was mind-boggling to think that these kids had been sent to war, over oil - and greed and corruption. Bring them home.
*and in a major speech, Bush says "we cannot allow an oil-rich nation in the Middle East to become a terrorist state" so the war really is all about oil - and all those protesters that had no blood for oil signs, they were absolutely right.

katie and kristen are having an election drunkfest. yay! someone cares enough to watch election results with me. I was going to just keep dan in my ear until all results were in - i'm still going to do that, but i'll also have physical company, which is nice. well informed observers put our pickups in the house at 21-26 and in the senate - 5 seats (though 6 could very well happen) It promises to be exciting - or heartbreaking, election machine problems have already been reported in FL.

I hate going to lunch early, especially an hour early. It throw my whole day off, because I get back at 1pm and then i have four hours to go instead of three. Also, I think I ate too much at Denny's - but it was oh so good. Jen is a hero for always driving out from her work to have lunch with me. there's the Kerry non-issue, but then you have the House Majority Leader John Boehner (let's not even get into the hilarity that is this guy's name) "slams military, not Rumsfeld for Iraq mess" and "Boehner refuses to apologize for faulting generals" reports the Army Times. But which is the bigger according to the mainstream media? well, all i hear about is kerry kerry kerry. let's do a scientific study. go to google news. type "kerry and joke" (3190) then type "boehner and rumsfeld" (240). ergo, the kerry non-story is 12 times more popular than the HOUSE MAJORITY LEADER BLAMING THE TROOPS FOR THE IRAQ MESS. WHAT THE HELL IS THE MEDIA'S PROBLEM?!?

In other news (via americablog) - " President of National Association of Evangelicals accused of 3-year sexual relationship with gay hooker, and of taking drugs " hahahahahahha
*that is all*

Speaking of Kerry - inspired by Americablog (who had it from MyDD) I sent this message:


In 2004, over 171,154 Americans donated $328,479,245 and countless hours of time to help you get elected President. Now, two years later, Democrats have a real opportunity to regain a majority in both chambers of Congress. However, you are still hanging on to $8,352,685 of our money, while Democratic candidates in competitive districts are short on funds, and the DNC, DCCC, and DSCC are out of money.Please release some of that money to help win back a Democratic congress.

Thank you,

Shortly after I got a reply that went like this:

"Thank you for your message, and we appreciate hearing from you.

Unfortunately, the anonymous website which directed you to us is full of lies and misleading statements.

We wanted to make sure you had complete, accurate information about John Kerry's efforts over the last 2 years to support Democratic candidates up and down the ticket all across the country. Here are the facts:

"Give me five more John Kerry's," says Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee Chairman Rahm Emanuel (D-Ill.). "He's a fighter, and he puts his money where his mouth is. " – Roll Call, 5.1.06

No one has done more than John Kerry to support Democratic candidates. 11 million dollars. Over 200 candidates in more than 40 states. That's how much, together, the community and John Kerry have given to or raised for Democratic candidates and committees since November 2004. John Kerry is aggressively fundraising for Democratic candidates in 2006 – making direct contributions to campaigns, attending and hosting events in the states, emailing his 3 million person list of supporters on behalf of candidates, and raising money for state parties, the DNC, DSCC and DCCC.
"He also won plaudits for working on behalf of House candidates. `The question is was somebody willing to stand up back in the dark days when I needed help, and he was,' said US Representative Rahm Emanuel, chairman of the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee. -- Boston Globe, Brian Mooney, 10/9/06
Kerry has personally traveled to 24 states to appear with candidates and rally support at the grassroots. Kerry has made over 85 trips across the country to support Democratic candidates this cycle.
Kerry gave $1 million to the Democratic National Committee and raised an additional $250,000 for the DNC online. Kerry also gave $1 million to the Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee and $500,000 to the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee. Kerry contributed $50,000 to the Louisiana State Party and gave $250,000 to the Washington State Democratic Party which helped finance a recount when the Republican party challenged the win of Gov. Christine Gregoire in 2005. With the help of the community, together we have raised over 100K each for 11 candidates, including Cantwell, Bill Nelson, Byrd, Sherrod Brown, Ford, McCaskill, Klobuchar, Webb, Duckworth, Patrick Murphy and Joe Sestak.
"Kerry has a big electronic address book and he hasn't been shy about using it…it's also bringing in quite a bit of money for Democrats nationwide…he has given or raised nearly $10 million for Democratic candidates and committees since November 2004." – Washington Post, "Kerry Treasury Department," 7.2.06
Getting veteran candidates elected to key seats is a top priority for John Kerry in 2006. He has actively supported over a dozen veteran candidates, including Jim Webb, Tammy Duckworth, and Chris Carney. "The Winners: John Kerry: Kerry not only endorsed Webb but appeared with him Monday for a last-minute campaign rally. Kerry also used his national e-mail list to raise cash and turn out the vote."–, The Fix, "VA Senate Winners and Losers," 6.14.06
Additionally, in 2005-06, John Kerry contributed or raised over $175,200 on behalf of the Massachusetts Democratic party, He has used his email list to recruit over 500 volunteers to support the state's efforts to elect Democrats in November. In the last two months before the election, he will attend 5 events in support of Deval Patrick, the Democratic nominee for Governor, and the Democratic ticket. "

BLAH BLAH BLAH I say. But really, "Unfortunately, the anonymous website which directed you to us is full of lies and misleading statements." 1. How do they know that I'm coming from a website, maybe they idea just popped into my head that Kerry has lots of money, dems need it and maybe he should cough it up. 2. so they knew i was coming from a website, which means they assumed which one it was, and then went on to attack it as being full of lies and misleading statements. I don't really know what's misleading about kerry has money, ask him to give some of it up. i don't think that attacking the blogs that are providing new power for the democratic party is a very smart idea. Mr. kerry, I like you even less than i did previously.

Did I mention that GOOGLE was offered at it's IPO for $85, two years ago? it's now trading at $469.91 - boy I missed the boat on that one. I did say to myself years and years ago, man, i should sure buy me some of that there google. and then i didn't. and then i cried. google.... increased its value by 5.5 times. jalynn.... cried. i say to myself, jalynn, what were you doing two years ago with $85? hmmmm, if you said sitting on it in a savings account, you would be correct. if I had only taken, oh $500, invested it in google and cashed out now, i'd have ~$2300 more dollars than i have right now. well done jalynn, well done.

my new favorite past time is looking up random articles on wikipedia.

In the proud spirit of featuring guest bloggers, here's a post from J9 Brizzle, lifted wholesale from her blog:
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
Seriously? Do I have to put a magnet on my car for that too?
I think the level of patriotism (read: nationalism) in our country has reached a preposterous level. I attended an art gallery opening today and the host introduced a speaker by saying "he recently served our proud country by acting as the United States Ambassador to Belgium." And, for some reason, people felt the need to applaud this "service to our proud country." Seriously? I mean, I completely support the men and women serving our country as troops both domestically and abroad. I can see commending people that have put their life on the line, when duty has asked this of them... but f*cking the Ambassador to Belgium? Yeah. There's a guy that really ponied up to serve. I mean, Belgium is totally such a rogue nation. What with their fine chocolates that, if consumed to excess, would make the masses succumb to the ever-feared Belgian agenda. But, no, Senor Speaker Guy used his vast diplomatic skills to ensure our land would not be invaded by the infamous and cruel Waffle Brigade. A triumphant feat indeed. And for this, I applaud and "woot" for you, sir.

I hate when I get into work late and then feel compelled to stay late to make up for it. That means instead of leaving in 37 minutes, I'll leave in 47 - that just seems so much closer to an hour, and at this point in the day, an hour is terribly long.

this is scary in maryland once you say yes to sex and start intercourse, you can't say no.

Oh we can wish and hope....
From a diary at dailykos:

Former President George W. Bush began serving consecutive life sentences today for High Treason in connection convictions for creating a false casus beli for War with Iraq. He was sentenced to Life plus 100 years. He is also serving a life term for warrantless wiretapping. He is also serving a life term for war profiteering. He is also serving a life term for his role in America's shameful torture gulags. He is also serving a life sentence for 156 of the 175 signing orders, and failure to abide by Federal court rulings and Obstruction of Justice and Perjury.
President Jon Stewart today said, "It's a little sad really. I owe him a lot. I mean, basically he launched my career." Vice President Colbert was unavailable while vacationing in France visiting relatives and stopping by the new UN Headquarters in London on the way back from his rest. In a prepared statement, the Vice President said, "We are all sad and shamed at what George W Bush wrought upon this great nation. Perhaps this will be the new beginning America needs."
Breaking a long silence on the disappearance of former Vice President Dick Cheney, George W Bush's Vice President, the President announced that Cheney was convicted of treason in a secret military tribunal. When asked what would happen to the former Bush official, Stewart answered "He's on his way to Syria in an unmarked jet." Pundits have been conjecturing that Cheney is being waterboarded. Some say he would never survive at his age and poor health. One anonymous official said `former CIA agents would buy tickets to his tortures,' but Stewart Administration Officials refused to comment further.
Department of Health Secretary Michael J. Fox ran his first marathon after years of successful stem cell therapy. He also visited the National Stem Cell Harvesting Lab in the former Huntsville Penitentiary, in Huntsville Alabama, where former Bush Administration officials are working off their prison terms, harvesting stem cells for research and medicine.
A secret military tribunal stripped Federal inmate Rush Limbaugh of his citizenship for years of smearing American heroes. The former extremist is serving a life sentence for propaganda, crimes against the states, and drug trafficking. He shares a cell with convicted propagandist Bill O Reilly, also stripped of his citizenship and serving a life term for treason and propaganda. Mona Charen escaped from the Federal facility some months ago and two weeks ago her body was located on the south end of the island. Without knowing exactly where the island is, authorities reported she died of hypothermia and was eaten by some wild animal. In other Justice Department news, Convicted traitiors Ann Coulter, Michelle Malagang and Judith Miller were denied parole again, and according to military tribunal spokespeople, the last time. Under the new law, they cannot speak in public or publish for the rest of their lives. Convicted propagandist Sean Hannity is challenging his sentence. A Federal judge convicted him of treason and perjury and war mongering and sentenced him to changing bedpans and diapers of soldiers wounded in Iraq II. His attorney says it is "cruel and unusual". At least he has an attorney, said Spitzer.
Films of Donald Rumsfeld and 122 CIA torturers sold today on e-bay for $1million dollars. Rumsfeld and 122 others were found guilty of torture and arrested and tried in Europe in a televised event. A military photographer was allowed to visit the inmates and promised to sell the photos and advance all proceeds to families of American servicemen who are suffering from their wounds. NATO authorities made the arrests and are prosecuting the remaining cases that are now thought to be backlogged for at least 12 years. World Court press releases reveal a request from the United States for an additional $15 billion to find Bush Administration officials still on the loose and thought to be hiding from prosecution. Rumsfeld had warrants in 28 nations by the end of the second Bush Administration.
Chelsea Clinton accepted the position as National Health Care Director. She will administer the application of free medicine to Americans. Ms. Clinton is expected to offer up a budget to Congress in the coming weeks of over $300 billion dollars. The National Health Care Bill provides top medicine to all Americans. Also, it forbids medical providers to withhold service to anyone. It also allows only the National Insurance Agency to bid on care. The National Insurance Agency is the largest and most effective health care provider of its kind outside of China. Each American owns at least a share of the national insurance agency.
The National Freedom Restoration Act Director Michael Moore announced that it will require another 3 years just to locate all the rules and laws that were written by industry officials on the state level. "All Federal statutes and laws and protections that were destroyed by Bush Administration officials have been corrected," said Moore. "It is the corruption in 50 states that will take time to correct." Also, facilities to record and post all meetings between lobbyists and Congressmen will go online at the end of the year. Until that time, all unrecorded lobbying is illegal.
RJ Reynolds worked an agreement with Attorney General Elliot Spitzer and agreed produce all domestic marijuana cigarettes in return for billions in illegal profits returned to the national treasury, and the jailing of an undisclosed number of RJR officials who hid the facts about tobacco from the public. AG Spitzer announced that the splitting of both Wal*Mart and Microsoft will be completed by the end of fiscal 2016. Also, the last hidden profits from Halliburton have been credited back to US courts after investigators and a whistleblower revealed where the money had been hidden. Descriptions and photos of Custer Battles and KBR employees on the loose can be downloaded at NRFA/
The National Science and Evolution Festival kicked off Monday with public school students around the country competing for projects in evolutionary science and nature. Last year, an Ohio 10th grader showed evolutionary changes in house flies in two generations and won a million dollars. Under the National Restoration Freedom Act no one can graduate high school in America without a thorough understanding of Evolution.
The Dow Jones closed at 21,873 today and New York Stock Exchange officials announced that more Americans own stocks than ever before.
The Interior Department announced that more lands have been reclaimed from public developers in 2012 than originally thought. With the addition of a billion acres of wetland added to the National Restricted Development areas, including the newly opened Interstate 10 and the 300,000 acre Katrina Memorial Park on the Gulf Coast.
Republican terrorist groups threatened to disrupt upcoming elections next year. However, experts say that online voting has made disrupting elections so rare that they doubt that domestic terrorists will have much effect on the elections.
Election experts predict massive Congressional wins for the Progressive Party that is expected to hold 200 seats. Democrats will likely hold onto 20 of the remaining 38 seats and Independants will hold the rest. Under the National Restoration Freedom Act, Republicans will not be allowed to fly, vote or run for office until 2030. Experts predict by then the Republican Party will be a memory. A painful one, but a memorynonetheless.
Billionaire Markos Moulitsas denies he has offered to sell Daily Kos to Google. Mr. Moulitsas has also denied that he will step down from President of the national Progressive Party and run for President. "I have no control over the party. Truly I don't," he told reporters.
The FBI reported today that crime was down for a 6th consecutive year under Progressive rule. World terrorism also fell again, and Ahmad Almandi will be the first Palestinian Secretary General of the UN. Palestine became a nation in 2009.
Divorce attorneys are losing ground, says the American Bar Association. "Americans are staying married longer and Gay marriages are the longest lasting," experts say.
The Old Fox News sign that once sat on a building near Times square went on sale at e-bay and was sold for $14.
This is David Brinkley III for National Public Radio.

I had a fantastic weekend in Philadelphia! The only downside was that our flight was delayed leaving on Friday night so I missed the cards win the world series, and we had a 6:30a flight on monday - but the rest of the weekend was brilliant. Nick is an absolute hero and surrendered his bed to us for the entirety of our stay. his apartment is absolutely amazing - all exposed brick, exposed beams, giant windows and hardwood floors, complete with loft. saturday i got to see dan and ariela! and sunday nick, ariela, jen and i went to nyc and met up with my dear friend matt - who i haven't see in ages. We went on a food tour of new york. grey's papaya for hot dogs, a delicious french bakery for sugary treats, rays original pizza and pomme frites for some supurb belgian fries with mango mayo, peppercorn parmesean mayo, curry ketsup, rosemary garlic mayo and pesto mayo -- mmm mm. I can't wait to go back and I would love to move to philly/nyc as soon as possible.

I mean we have to get out or stl right? because it's fucking dangerous, i'd like to point out that st. louis beat out detroit and compton for the most dangerouscity award. so much for that loft downtown sometime in our near future.

also, we skipped work monday - we called in and told our respective bosses that there was a mechanical difficulty on our flight and it was cancelled, we were forced to take a (much) later flight. what did that mean for us? going back to bed, which we were grateful for because it was 4:30 est when we got up.

so last week or two weeks ago, I read that 4 soldiers were killed in iraq - 3 marines and a sailor. here's what i want to know, what was a sailor doing in the fucking desert? oh right, i remember, they don't have enough ground troops so they're retraining sailors and airmen as infantry. way to go usa.

A little fun from MS over at Gosh shoe:

Dear Sir/Ms:

My daughter is a freshman at Goshu. Two weeks ago I decided to modify my business trip (we are from California) to visit her. I also did a fair bit of homework up front to get a map of the campus, location of parking spaces as well as location of where I could purchase parking passes. The VERY FIRST thing I did when I arrived on campus was to go to the bookstore to purchase 2 one-day passes as I planned to visit her over a 2 day period. The next thing I did was go park in a Yellow Zone as I believe I was supposed to and put the first of the two passes on the rear view mirror so it could be properly viewed. I felt good that I thought I had done everything correctly.

Two hours later i returned to my car . . . and had received a ticket! I could not imagine what it was for. So I read the citation . . . "ticket not scratched!" Then I looked at the fine print on the pass, and sure enough, it says that the ticket needs to be scratched.

I was furious! I had a few options: 1. pay the citation. 2. follow-up with you. 3. throw it away.

Option 1: pay the citation was not a good one for two reasons: a) unfair. had the bookstore warned me, maybe. but b) had i paid, i knew if would affect my donation to the school - why would someone want to give generously to a school that dislikes its parents and alumni?

Option 2: Follow-up with you. That one was an easy No. I chose to spend time with my daughter (while on campus).

Option 3:. Throw it away. Best choice. The school had already been paid for my parking for my two visitation days. I was driving a rental, so the probability that I would need to deal with reprocussions was small. And it didn't seem fair that a school as a whole should penalized (changing a donation) for the EXTREMELY POOR JUDGEMENT of the campus parking services.

So now I would like to submit to you a question that you may want to give some thought to: DO YOU CARE ABOUT PARENT/ALUMNI RELATIONS?

If so, I suggest that you think about your ultraaggressive fine policy. If you don't care, please let me know as I will be seeing the chancellor on Saturday and would like to discuss whether he and the rest of the Gosh shoe administrative community agrees with your tactics.

NOTE: The rest of the U.S. issues warnings or other forms of notice that seems to do the trick. Perhaps you may want to consider learning from them.

and her response:

Mr. Mxxxxx:

As stated on the back of your parking citation,Gosh shoe has an "Only Ticket Policy," which means that the shoe will void one parking citation per fiscal year (July 1 – June 30). If this is your only citation, and you don't receive another citation from gosh shoeby June 30, 2007, this ticket will be automatically voided. This policy serves as the "warning" system you suggested the shoe adopt.

We strive to maintain adequate signage to ensure proper parking for our students, staff and visitors, and we also try to provide clear and concise instructions for parking through our website, from our staff, and on the permit. I am truly sorry that you found the instructions on the daily permit to be inadequate.

Since our campus is located in an urban area, the parking situation is very difficult to maintain. Additionally, there are currently many construction projects on campus which will be bringing some exciting additions and changes - until these projects are complete, available parking has been greatly affected, which in turn affects everyone in the shoe community. It has been a very difficult time indeed as we await the completion of these projects while maintaining sufficient available parking. In order to guarantee that everyone who wishes to drive to campus may find a place to park, it is necessary to require permit-only parking areas and to strictly enforce these areas.

It is not an attempt to break down the relationship of Gosh Shoe with its parents and alumni - we try to best accommodate everyone who wishes to be a part of the shoe, and it is the mission of our department to do so with fairness, courtesy, consistency and efficiency. We truly respect each individual who makes Gosh shoe the outstanding institution that it is, which absolutely includes parents and alumni.

I would like you to know that I have forwarded your comments to the Director of Parking Services, and I thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts and concerns with us.

Again, I would like to apologize for your inconveniences with this matter, and ask for your understanding. I hope that you have not been deterred from visiting Gosh shoe's campus or enjoying the time you spend here. Please feel free to call our office for assistance with parking – you can reach us at 555-555-5555. I gathered from your e-mail that you are planning to attend Parents' Weekend. I hope that you have a safe trip and enjoy your visit. Please let me know if there's any way I can help.

Thank you,


Customer Service Representative

Gosh shoe Parking Services

and there was no more that day.