Tuesday, October 10, 2006

9:08a
I hate mondays! and my buddy at work shane, resigned on friday because of family issues. and he was one of my favorites. and we altered captain smiley on friday. Captain smiley now has a post it for a head (so he can change emotions) and he's holding his "real" head in his hand. It is seriously fucked up. If i can find my digital camera, pictures will be forth coming. anyway, shane left and that sucks. also joe is not here yet. but, but, i do have a cheesy bagel.

9:30a
Joe finally showed up, I guess he thought that the new schedule was starting today, actually it starts next monday, but whatever.

10:08a
Weekend was good, too short but good. I went to WILD - yes it was in fact my third WILD since I graduated and you know what? It was still fun and I saw lots of people that had graduated last year and the year before. Also, unlike the previous five years, the weather was beautiful. God dammit.

10:23a
Oh yeah, NORTH KOREA TESTED A NUCLEAR WEAPON! that is all.

11:02a
Like a small child, North Korea threatened to do something destructive, the parents said no no don't do that, and then North Korea did it. The tested a nuclear bomb. This is worrisome for a number of reasons. Earlier this year, everyone got fussy because NK threatened a missile test. The world blustered and said no you can't and NK said oh yes we can. Now they've done the same thing with a NUCLEAR bomb - making them members of the nuke gang...a very very unstable member. No one seems to have any sway over this rogue state and they have complete disregard for international law and standards (wonder where they got that from) - point is they have no problem with producing government sponsored very good forgeries - what's to stop them from selling a small nuclear weapon to a terrorist group? That is the real threat of a nuclear NK - not that they will attack one of their neighbors - surely they would be crushed under the world-wide response but that they will sell their technology to an amorphous terrorist group, that can not be subjugated by overwhelming military force.

Will NK's nuclear test give Bush (a perceived) measure of sanity if he were to attack IRAN now to prevent Iran from doing the same thing? But wouldn't that be lost because he just let NK sit there for years and years, doing nothing but concentrating on a pointless war in Iraq - a country that definitely didn't have nuclear weapons...

11:22a
Oh some poor fuck accepted $3000 in our cash based product in the $500 denominations - he was calling to verify the serial numbers before he deposited them in his bank account. The guy is a poor fuck because our highest denom is $100 - which means he got jacked for $3000. he sounded absolutely bummed - I hate when good, common people get screwed.

11:52a
That poor fuck was in receipt of $6000 in fraudulent product.

12:31p
I hate when they fuck around with my lunch...today we went back to hour lunches, but they moved mine up to 12 - this means that when i get done with lunch, I still have 4.5 hours of work - without any breaks. bleh.

12:51p
I may have to split for awhile this afternoon due to training - we'll see. Also, we have a guest blooger today:

J9 Brizzle blogging from Stalks Corp:

Rovian Plot?
Corruption, torture, deception, incompetence, and now child molestation. Way to go GOP, you now own all these things five weeks before elections.Bad move, Republicans, bad move. Or...was this all done on purpose... is this all a part of some crazy plot? Has this been Karl Rove's plan all along? Was he drinking with Newt Gingrich and Bill O'Reilly one night and say ..... Karl: Newt, you think you're so badass, sparking the Republicon comeback... whatever bro. You know what? I bet I could totally win this election. No. Matter. What. F*ckin' seriously bros - I'll take away internationally respected human rights that have been in place for 200 years, leak evidence about how we actually HAVE been lying about Iraq, AND AND AND, have it be revealed that not only is one of our candidates racist but that we've also got a pedophile! A friggin pedophile! And with all that, I bet I could still win! Newt & Bill: Bullsh*t dude.Karl: How much you wanna bet?Newt & Bill: Wanna bet privacy, corporate checks & balances, open civil discourse, and the separation of church & state? Karl: Well, we've already started getting rid of that sh*t ... how about just a 12 pack?Newt: I'm down. Bill: Totally.Karl: HaHa - you're on pussies! You guys are gonna owe me so much beer after this! Woo!(Rove throws back his frosty mug, slams it on the table and continues the friendly game of darts the trio was playing *thwap* and lands a bullseye smack in the middle of the Bill of Rights taped precariously to the board.) Karl: Who da man?! Hell yeah! F*ck habeas corpus! Fist Pound!Let's hope this recent scandal and insanity FINALLY wakes people up.
(Editors Note: I don't think North Korea testing a nuclear weapon was part of teh bet - lucky us)
Arthouse Smut
I hardly do any work (as evident by my Monday to Friday blogging.) I hope the office never actually looks at the internet log they have on file for me. Today, I started reading this "Slate" online magazine article about this new art-house indie film which includes hard-core, explicit scenes. Halfway through treading it, I realized they included photo-stills from the film in the article itself.

How would I ever explain myself out of that one?

"Janine, were you looking at pornography on the company computer? During work hours?"

"What?! No! It's, it's high art guys! A social commentary on aggressive sex and the smut industry – not the smut itself! See?! There's a difference…
Smut Pornography: a scene of nasty, dirty sex with hardcore shots galore, as opposed to…
Art house Smut Pornography: a scene of nasty, dirty sex with hardcore shots galore set to the music of Peaches and ending with the actors reading a Sylvia Plath poem!
Don't you see the difference?!"

Nasty Potty
Nasty Potty
Despite the professional setting, the bathrooms in my building are often disgusting. People not flushing, leaving paper towels on the floor, the list goes on (well, at least beyond two things.)

Well, yesterday on my trip to the restroom, someone had left their used toilet-seat cover on the toilet! What?! Um, yeah, I don't want your ass-paper, thanks but no thanks.

Unbelievable.

(Editors Note: I completely heart J9 over this issue - what is it with people that leave their ass paper still on the seat - also what does that paper REALLY block? nothing.)

Also yesterday, to put a lovely end to such a nice workday, someone dinged the side of my car hard enough with their door so as to not only leave a nice little dent, but also transfer paint from their own car onto mine. I think I'm going to writing a note on my car that reads:

To the dick that dinged my car yesterday,

I would have thought that our office camaraderie would have made our relationship more honest. Honest enough, at least, to warrant a little note after you dented my car.

I mean, not that I absolutely adore my car or anything; frankly I find beetles and the people who drive them a little obnoxious. But I got a good deal on it and it treats me well. I actually think my beetle's exceptionally cute compared to others, but that's just my opinion.

But what an end to a glorious workday spent typing & typing away in order to get you the information YOU need to do YOUR job. My research position affects everyone in the company and I do it with little verbal complaining despite the fact that the work is mind-numbing and would make a marine's iron will snap.

Oh no, despite all I've done for you, you still refuse to fess up to the mutilation (yes! MUTILATION! And I'm not exaggerating goddamnit!) you have caused to my little Ricardo. (Yes, I've now named the car, shut up. You f*cked up my car, so you're not allowed to say anything about it.) Anyhoo, I harbor no hard feelings. I guess I just thought better of you. As co-workers I would have thought that you'd be a good person, good enough to leave a note with your name, number, insurance information and a simple "sorry" so that I could call your sorry butt up and make you fix my sh*t! But you didn't and I'm a good person so I harbor no hard feelings … other than wanting you to suffer the most excruciating pain known to man.

A simple paper cut would be nice.

Sincerely,
J9 Brizzle
(That's right! I'm gansta b*tch - watch yo' back! I got you, I GOT YOU!)

1:03p
Apparently NK's nuclear test was a dud - but they still tried and we should still be worried.

1:08p
So that guy that I was on the phone with for an hour last week, just called....to say thank you.

1:09p
Yay! The sales rep who is listening to calls (ie. training) is not sittign with me!

1:41p
Let's just talk about how the low on thursday is 31 degrees (that's below freezing) and also, it was dark this morning - very dark, and we got up late. i hate the winter. fortunately daylight savings is coming up at the end of teh month which meeans that it will be light in the morning for about a week and then dark forever. and then it will be spring. now jalynn, you're jumping to the end of the month like it's not even there, well guess what? Its 10/09, this weekend is ani and the wine festival, next weekend, is the weenie roast, dresden dolls and broken social scene, and the following weekend is halloween and jen's business trip to Philly. and then it's november. fuck that. that last time i could actually remember and feel like i was in the moment was june. july, august, and september just got away from me.

2:03p
OHHHH! I did dishes. ALL of them. Hooray!

2:27p
I'd like to go home now. 3hr 2min remain. 34 interactions.

3:57p
Yeah. Google bought YouTube for $1.65 BILLION. I wish I had $1.65 billion to just throw around. Not surprisingly, Google is up $8.5 today. How long until facebook gets bought out?

4:14p
I would like to go home now. 1hr 15min remain. 45 interactions.

4:41p
Note: Keith Olbermann is supposed to deliver another special comment tonight. Watch it or catch it on crooksandliars immediately following the broadcast if you don't have cable.

4:45p
I just got the same woman for the third time - everytime I get her, she tells me the same thing - she needs a copy of an invoice. And I tell her the same thing - she needs to speak with her Project Manager. And every time I get her on the phone I ask her if she contacted her Project Manager and everytime she comes back she's talked to everyone and their brother, but not her PM. Now, I tried to transfer her and the system dropped the call twice. I SWEAR I didn't hang up on her, but I wanted to. Now it's like russian roulette - waiting to see which one of us is going to get her on the phone again.

5:02p
I just got cold.

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