Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Just so everyone knows, there are approximately 1,706,580 shitheads in the state of Texas. These idiots added language to their constitution that denies same-sex marriage, same-sex union, same-sex contract of any kind that may possibly resemble marriage or possibly anything. The amendment is so vaguely worded that it could be construed to ban traditional marriage between and man and a woman.

In other news, the voters in Maine voted to DO THE RIGHT THING, and affirmed the new law that prohibits discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation.

It is literally impossible to keep people in my apartment. In the past three years, we have had over 12 people live in the apartment, three have moved out under unique circumstances. Now, we are again looking for a roommate - someone who will enjoy the company of three lesbos, two cats and a pot head.

Finally we have a break/lunch schedule here at work that doesn't screw anyone over.

I just talked to a Champagne Ambassador, her company distributes Champagne. I want that job. She was very french and very frazzled. She informed me that she was in the car and she was trying not to kill anyone or herself. I opted to make the call brief.

Don't read something while I'm trying to help you by filling out a form. There should not be seconds and seconds of dead air on the phone while you ponder a simple question like "Your company's name?" This makes me think that you are a prank caller, you don't even know your company's name, but really, as you informed me, you're just busy reading something. Oh. Ok. Now, I feel better about helping you. Because instead of being a money launderer, you're just a jackass.

There is a sticker on the paper towel dispense in the restroom that says emergency feed. As if when I couldn't get a paper towel out of the dispenser it would become an emergency and I would have to take evasive emergency action and use the "emergency feed." Emergency? Really? Is it . . . an emergency? Really?

Sometimes my coworkers are not so bright, the are just now questioning some changes that happened, oh two weeks ago. They're talking about some new limits on something, and I'm staring at the memo that I printed out and posted on my wall, oh two weeks ago.

Once again, I'm sitting indoors with my gloves, hat, and winter coat on. In addition to the two pairs of socks, running tights, regular pants, wife beater, button down and sweater that i usually wear. The thought of a really cold winter in this office building makes me shiver. Literally.

For all of you who love politics as much as I do, here's up to date polling information for the 2006 senate and gubernatorial races, compliments of Dan:

Polling Data 2006

Hey guy, sorry that you think that because you're using your credit card that happens to be the same brand as one of our products that you don't have to pay the fee. In reality, we don't give things away for free, which is why you have to pay a fee. And the option I gave you is where you are going to find the lowest fee. You didn't believe me, so go forth, try to find a lower fee, and when you can't, come back to me.

God dammit people! Listen to what I am telling you before you continue talking. You just told me the same thing you told me before I gave you the solution. Now that I have given you the solution, shut up and think about what you are going to say before you say it. If it is your problem again, and it was solved by the solution that I offered, shut the hell up.

Good Lord! People want me to do things that cannot be done. If you can't do it on the website, what makes you think that I can magically get you what you want? Just because you get to talk to a live person, does not mean that they are not also constrained by the rules of the website. You just get a live person saying your order cannot be processed. Does that make you feel better?

So, someone else in my department might be ready to bite the dust. Greg has an interview this afternoon and if it goes well, he'll be ready to burn this bridge. Great, just great.

He (Greg) winked at me. <-- rolls eyes.

Angelina Jolie is 30 years old, 8 years my senior and I would totally do her, or beg for her to do me. Either way, who doesn't love Angelina?

I've changed my mind about James (my cubemate for all those not paying attention). I like him, he was just quiet to start, and he has a temper, but I am definitely beginning to like him.

James just offered to get me in touch with people that could "talk" to my errant roommate, I declined emphatically. I don't think the situation merits a beat down. But thanks James!


Blogger Ariela said...

oh jalynn, you never cease to amuse me... not "amaze," but "amuse."

in other news, tomorrow is blue hill night. thank the gods.

7:33 PM  

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